December 28, 2008

Three Days.


I have three days to make a decision.
The most random but enticingly wonderful door flew open for me.
I've been asked to go with a team to Ghana in March for two weeks to build a school and be with the children there.
I met the team today, five men and one gal. The team leader, Dale, is one of those people I'm just drawn to.. when we all prayed together I recognized something beautiful and deep in his spirit. The same goes for a couple of the others (i don't even know their names..). They need another girl to go.
I'm their hope.
How random.

or is it..

I'm available. I've been seeking God and asking Him what's next. Nothing has really grabbed me yet. But I realized this afternoon after sobbing for fifteen minutes while I drove home after the Ghana meeting that I'm restricting myself. I'm not letting myself get excited or be drawn to anything because I'm so afraid that I'll wind up doing something I wasn't supposed to do. I'm so afraid of making a decision only to find that there was something else I was supposed to do; that I was wrong. That, and it all seems too easy. I went to church with my parents one night and their pastor (the same incredible man of God that started my church) approached me after the service and said, "Kendra! I've been thinking about you a lot lately." (umm..okay..strange?) "We have a team going to Ghana in March, if you're interested. We'd love to have you on board." I've never talked to the man in my life. Okay, maybe I smiled politely and said hello once this summer. But I'm certain that was the extent of it.
And I've wanted Africa.. ohhh, how I've wanted Africa! I want the dirt and the children and all those bright, vibrant colors swirling together with the sounds of drums and laughter and the rain, the pouring, pounding rain in the distance.. I want to live with nothing. I want to go with bursting suitcases and come back with absolutely nothing, save the clothes on my back, hands full of blisters and a throbbing, aching, broken, full heart.

I have three days to make a decision.
I think it's almost made.

3 comments:

Heather on December 28, 2008 at 7:18 PM said...

MMMMmmmmm...i remember one time we were dreaming about Africa together...oh Ken...=D....!!!!

Emily Elizabeth on December 30, 2008 at 3:52 PM said...

:-) regardless of whether you make the 'wrong' decision, i know that if your heart is in the right place God will lead you to where He want you to be anyways simply becasue you want what He wants for you.

above all else: Love on December 31, 2008 at 9:24 PM said...

the great commission.
Simply, Go.

 

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